Excerpts from The New Old Maid

“The New Old Maid: How Happily Unmarried Women are Defying Spinster Stereotypes,” will be published in the fall of 2017 by Chatterhouse Press.

In it, women from all over the U.S. who are over 40 and have never been married talk about: relationships, sex, money, careers, loneliness, ambition, thoughts about aging and being single, finances and much much more.

The book explores:

  • The Benefits of Being a Single Woman
  • The Downside to Being an Old Maid
  • What Other People Think of us and What We Think of Ourselves
  • What Lives we Lead
  • Attitudes Toward Marriage and Where They Come From
  • The Mommy Gene
  • (Not) Marrying for Money
  • Dating and Relationships

From The New Old Maid:

There’s more to me than my marital status. That’s true – of course – for married women as well. It’s just that they don’t find themselves shadowed by the big “but,” as in, “She climbed Mt. Everest and swam across the English Channel, but she never found the right guy. How sad.” An old maid could find a cure for cancer, figure out a way to reverse climate change in a week and invent high heels that felt like cushy slippers when you wore them but at her funeral, people would still whisper, “She never married,” as if that canceled everything else out.

Eleanore, on taking a new job halfway around the world:

spin-in-spinster“One of the things that’s so awesome about being single, with no kids, is I thought about it for five minutes and said, ‘Yes!’” says the marketing professional. “I didn’t have to think. I didn’t have to consult with anybody. I didn’t have to figure out what I was going to do with the kids. Are they going to like it? I had complete freedom. One of my favorite lines is that, as a single woman, I am free to spend my money and my time however I want, always. And this is a perfect example of that. This is something that sounds exciting. I’m going to do it. And you know what? There’s not a soul else who I have to consider as a part of this. I love that.”

Leanne, on traveling alone:

“The first time I did it I was scared to death. I thought; ‘I’m going to be a total loser, sitting in my hotel room with room service.’ But not at all. I have some of the best times traveling all by myself, because it forces you to confront who you really are, but also, every single thing is a blank slate. Nobody knows you. Nobody has a preconceived notion. You can be whoever you want to be. If you’re feeling confident that day, you can exude confidence. If you’re feeling shy and withdrawn, that’s cool, too. I love traveling alone.”

Sally, on why she’ll never marry her boyfriend of 20+ years:

“At this point, I don’t want to, because I’ve been on my own, my own boss, my own person my whole life. If we got married and he thought that I was going to talk over with him whether I was getting a new couch or not – I ain’t! If we’re not married, I don’t have to. He still doesn’t like that too much.”

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